Leap Of Faith
by IndyStarkDeanJr
Summary: [Unfaithful] "It takes a leap of faith to get things going" A late invitation from Cuddy to House.
1. Chapter 1

**Leap of Faith**

* * *

 _Here is a new story. It takes place during "Unfaithful", about two hours after Cuddy and House left the hospital ... and went in opposite directions._

 _House is at his piano. Cuddy's on the road._

 _It took me a year to write this. It's now finished and divided in four parts._

 _I held it in a precious place in my heart and it's a story that I love deeply. The title is a song by Springsteen, again._

 _Please, enjoy and love your reading as much as I loved writing-living-experiencing it._

 _Best,_

 _Ju_

 _PS : I publish today, June 11th. It's a sweet day. It's my man's day. Happy Birthday, Hugh. Love u._

* * *

 **Chapter I**

 **6.20 p.m**

"Hi"

His surprise told her she was the last person he thought finding behind his door, especially that night.

"Can I come in?"

"What are you doing here?" he asked quietly but firmly.

"It's freezing"

House took a look at Rachel, enveloped in her clothes and a cover.

"Then why don't you go back to your place? There's noth- "

"Please"

Cuddy was shivering, though there wasn't any cold air. She had left winter outside but the apprehension and stress she felt made her cold. He finally stepped aside without any other comment, keeping his eyes on her as she made her way into his apartment. Apart from the logs cracking up in the fireplace, the apartment was uncomfortably silent. Suddenly, being here seemed to be the worst idea she's ever had. Cuddy turned to face him and was strangely reassured by his own discomfort.

"Can you hold her a second?"

House was about to protest but found himself with Rachel in his arms before he could barely open his mouth. Rachel was looking at him in the same way she did when Cuddy's come in his office – big baby blue eyes staring into his with a childish innocence and a profound curiosity. And has she recognized him or not, Rachel slightly giggled when her soft little hand met the roughness of his stubble.

Cuddy took off her coat and scarf, leaving them on the back of the couch. Her heart melted at the vision before her eyes. Looking at the Diagnostician holding her daughter, she knew that was what she wanted. The beginning of a smile emerged on her face. But convincing the man of her true feelings for him would be a more difficult task. She was very well aware of his fears and apprehensions because at some extent they matched her own.

"You're not gonna puke on me again, ha?"

Cuddy slightly laughed at the fake worried tone of his voice. Their gaze met and the reality abruptly stepped in. His eyes darkened when he handed her Rachel with an uneasy smile. Their fingers brushed. His skin burnt under the contact.

"There is nothing here for you, Cuddy" he said dryly "you shouldn't be here at all"

She bit her lips and swallowed, replacing Rachel's clothes correctly on her back as she lay her little head on her shoulder. She couldn't find anything to say and felt her courage failing within seconds.

"You were playing" she said then, glancing at the piano as he did the same.

An uncomfortable silence followed and neither House nor Cuddy knew what to do, half-expecting the other to whereas speak first or run away. Hardly ever such a formidable awkwardness had stood between them. Although, noticing how embarrassed and nervous she was helped House to recollect from his early amazement.

"You wanna hear it?" he asked. His voice was hesitant as if he was afraid of receiving both a positive and a negative answer.

"I'd love to" she promptly responded and her eyes sparkled with a delighted interest.

He followed her caring movements as she installed her now sleeping daughter on the couch, making for her a protecting cocoon of cushions. He limped to the piano and sat on the bench. He couldn't see her face but imagined the little smile on her lips that she would only reserve for Rachel. Finally, Cuddy came nearer and he didn't take his eyes off her as she naturally took a place that seemed to have been waiting for her.

House couldn't remember the last time someone has shared that bench with him. He glanced at her, admiring her features and the soft shade of pink on her cheeks. She turned her head toward him. He could deal with her presence but not with what he was able to read in her blue eyes. With one hand, House pressed one of the keys and realized that he has never allowed anyone that close while playing, except his mother.

She was so close he could feel the heat of her leg and arm even if they weren't touching each other. He tried to forget the desire he felt rising in his body; thus began. Cuddy was following the stunning facility and devotion with which his fingers were dancing on the black and ivory keys. He's closed his eyes and she could easily see how captivated he was. He wasn't really there anymore. With a khaki and his Oxford pink shirt, she found him terribly elegant. For a moment, she couldn't take her eyes off his profile: the soft curves of his thin lips to his rough stubble, even the small chicken pox spot on his nose and the vein on his temple. She has never ever seen him so peaceful and tranquil, so handsome before in her life.

House's played it a dozen times this evening and the days before but never has he played the serenade that well. The woman who has inspired the melody was just inches away from the musician who knew very well that he would never find words as powerful as what he was trying to say with his piano. He wished she could understand what it meant for him to play for her. It was like sharing his most intimate thoughts and emotions.

When the serenade reached a more dynamic and cheerful rhythm, House opened his eyes and looked at her. Cuddy seemed engrossed by the music and oblivious of the delicate consideration of which she was the genuine object. Every note's been carefully chosen to express a part of her personality. The melancholic loneliness in her eyes – and sometimes in her smile too – when she thought no one could see her. That part of youthful insouciance he knew was deeply treasured inside her. Then, the unmissable softness of her feminine nature along with the irrational need of complete happiness. That was how House knew Cuddy: tenacious as a rock in the tempest but fragile as a leaf in the storm.

Like it's been written in his soul from him to her * and her very presence exceeded all what he's been trying to recreate through the music. He was a coward when it came to love and no such words would ever cross his lips. It couldn't be otherwise.

She deserved so much more than him and – despite the kiss and his own fearfulness – he convinced himself long ago that he was better all alone. He would love her with his piano, watching her from worlds apart. House saw Cuddy's contemplation being caught by the paper sheets spread on the piano. She paid no attention to the Schubert partition and slowly put the bourbon glass on the side. The silver bracelet on her wrist tinkled softly when she took them. He knew exactly how long the serenade would last and he wished he'd never have to stop and face the silence again. But as suddenly as they have filled the air, the notes faded away.

Cuddy knew it _was_ what she's just heard even if she did not understand nor was able to read the partition. Her attention was captured by the two words written at the top of the first page. The effortless handwriting was familiar to her eyes and her half-opened lips were the true expression of her sweet astonishment. The man by her side remained silent as if he was afraid of saying something he would immediately regret. Cuddy kept looking at the paper – like if she stayed there long enough it would reveal all its secrets. House found the silence more oppressing than ever, now that he couldn't hide himself behind music. She had thousands of questions in mind but only managed to formulate the most obvious one.

"Did you write that for me?"

"No, for your mother" he answered, rolling his eyes with fake exasperation then continue while she tried unsuccessfully to repress a smile "you're not the only Cuddy I know"

"Actually, I am"

"No, you're not"

One eyebrow raised, he kept staring at her in his own intensive and unique manner. Cuddy bit her lips and an adorable smile curved tenderly her mouth when she realized what – or precisely who – he was referring to. Both at the same time, House and Cuddy turned their head toward the sleeping infant. Cuddy felt herself being surrounded by a delicate sentiment that filled her with love and maternal pride. It was the first time House actually acknowledged directly to her the strong link that now bound mother and daughter together.

"I think she likes your pillows" she said aimlessly, looking at her daughter whose tiny fist was curled upon one of them.

"Why are you here?"

She could swear he was looking at her, his blue eyes searching for answers. Cuddy lowered her head and swallowed, interlacing nervously her fingers on her laps. She did not even have a proper answer to offer, disconcerted by what has just happened and somehow irritated by her own weakness to face the man she has eagerly come to visit. In a way, she felt like they have suddenly been transported twenty years back.

"Play it again for me" she begged in a whisper.

"You should go"

His voice was soft but firm. At the very moment when she looked into his eyes, House felt his courage flickering. He bit the interior of his cheek to repress the urgent need to kiss her there and then.

"Please, go. I'll see you on Monday" he insisted through his half-opened lips.

"I don't wanna go" she replied instantly, shaking slightly her hands "I want to stay with you, and Rachel. I want …"

She stopped, breathless, and shook her head. On that bench, next to him, every word she could have prepared vanished into the silence just as the music before them. House ran his tongue on his lips, half-expecting her to run away from him. He frowned, realizing that he was afraid she would do so when he was expressly asking her to. Taking a deep breath, Cuddy raised her head and looked into his blue eyes with a mix of sincerity and hope.

"When we kissed, when you came to me after I lost Joy I thought … I thought maybe it was the beginning of something new between us – or the revival of something older" she confessed quietly "but you screwed everything up. Every time I tried to … get closer, you backed off, you kept running away from me, acting like you didn't care, like it didn't mean anything to you" Cuddy sighed and lowered her head. She brushed the ivory keys with one finger "I did too, screwing things up. I should have … I'm stuck, we're stuck. We've lost what we had once. And I … I want to move forward but with you. I just want us to _be_ something, something more. »

She sighed heavily this time.

"And yet, you're the one who said you didn't want me there" he replied "that you didn't need someone _filled with loathing and contempt_ "

Hearing her own words on his lips was painful, but she knew she deserved it.

"I'm sorry" she said slowly, looking up "I didn't know what I wanted and – "

"We don't _have_ anything" he replied with a voice that let him think he was likely trying to convince himself "years ago, you hired me out of non-sense and sometimes I really wonder why, I lie to you, you lie to me, I ask for crazy procedures and make comments about your ass –"

"At the hospital. But things have changed … after Joy. Nothing has ever been strictly professional between us, you know that"

Her voice was calm but the fire burning in her grey eyes showed him how hard it was for her not to lose her temper. She looked fragile in all her determination.

"Whatever that was – that _thing_ between us – it changed because we both dropped our guard in a vulnerable moment"

"It was a mistake"

"No" she affirmed in a stronger voice. It made him almost smile to see how adamant she was "I was sad and hurt. And lonelier than ever. You came when I least expected you, taking away my pain … you comforted me in your own way, House. Even if it was just for a few seconds. Never have I considered it a mistake. It meant, it still means a lot to me"

Cuddy lowered her head, biting her lips. He was sure she wasn't even realizing the effects that simple gesture triggered in him. But when she placed one hand on his right thigh, inches away from his scar, and locked her eyes with his blue ones, he panicked. He felt his heart quickly pounding in his chest and blood rushing in his veins.

"I wish you'd stayed" she whispered, hearing nothing but her own breath and the echo of his voice.

"That wouldn't have been a good idea, you know it"

"It doesn't have to be so complicated"

"Cuddy, don't –"

He knew he had all the time in the world to stop her but when her hand found his neck, he was trapped _into_ her. Her fingers brushed the small hairs on his nape and the skin behind his ear. Her first touch sucked the air from his lungs. Breathless, Cuddy was mesmerized by the length of his lashes dancing before his eyes. She drew him a little closer and not leaving him time to speak, captured his thin lips in the tenderest kiss he has ever been given before.

He froze, taken aback by her sensitiveness. Her breath was warm and he profoundly breathed in. Cuddy felt his hesitation and claimed his mouth in another soft but more demanding kiss, and again, and again. Time has slowed and their world was reduced to where their body met. Their noses touched and his right hand found unwillingly her hip. She moaned softly, cupping his unshaven face into the palms of her hands. Cuddy shifted on the bench. Her entire body was responding to his touch. She felt as she has finally found the perfect place to rest, thrilled by the purity of their connection and careless of everything that wasn't him. She brushed his lips with her tongue. House groaned and froze instantly.

"Stop" he breathed, cupping her face and breaking the kiss.

There was a tiny streak of green on her eyes**, he thought, as he stared deeply into them. His chest was rising quickly as he tried to catch his breath.

* * *

 _End of Part One._

 _TBC..._

* * *

*Bob Dylan

**Hugh _The Gun Seller_


	2. Chapter 2

**Leap of Faith**

* * *

 _Thanks for the kind reviews ...  
_ _Here's the second part. Hope you like it as much._

* * *

 **Chapter II -**

"Come with me" she asked.

"No"

Cuddy suddenly felt empty and cold when he abandoned his position and stood abruptly.

"You don't have to talk to anyone, Wilson's here, even Chase. Just be there"

She stood and approached him, who was standing by the piano and giving the impression that he was leaning on the instrument for support. He was madly trying to ignore the fragrance of vanilla in her hair, the delicate touch of her Lancôme perfume but also her own natural scent. She was to close and yet not enough.

"Come with me"

He shook his head, standing straight. He felt stupid and angry.

"Cuddy, that's not what you want" he answered calmly. His throat tightened, then he continued without a breath "you're chasing something that's never existed. You don't really want me, you don't even need me. You think you do because of what you feel when _we_ kiss but – "

She interrupted him, invading his space.

"You think you have it all figured out" she shook her head, confused and irritated "that's what you do, rushing toward conclusions about _my_ feelings, my needs, accepting no other point of view than yours, protecting yourself from whoever try to approach you. You always do that."

She breathed.

"And it's wrong? Because I love the way you kiss me, the way I feel when I'm with you?" Cuddy wondered. Her voice wasn't as steady as she would have liked to sound "tell me it doesn't mean anything, you and me? Tell me it's not what you want. Tell me you don't feel anything and I leave"

She was almost pleading now, but her voice hasn't really changed. Cuddy crossed her arms then let them fall alongside her body. She barely recognized herself. House wanted to tell her exactly what his heart was screaming.

"It's not about that, you know how I feel" he finally offered, releasing a breath "are you leaving now?"

"No, I don't! You so rarely say something."

Unconsciously, she placed one hand on his sleeve, her thumb pressing against his skin. She suddenly looked more fragile than he has ever seen her – and more beautiful. He tensed then relaxed under the familiar touch. Their eyes met and for a second shared the same thought: no one ever dared touch him, except her. House never questioned the gestures, only seemed to accept them. There had been touches throughout times but few were voluntary and purposeful like this one. Even less touches were maintained more than a few seconds.

Her shoulder sank when he looked away. House understood that she has decided to play all her cards, to open up to him and be as honest as possible. She wanted that evening to be their moment – when they truly found each other. He could only love her more for that, but also was scared of her wants and expectations in regards of her own confessions. House started to obsess on the feelings of her fingers on his arm. When he glanced at her, her eyes were so full of respect and affection for him that it _actually_ hurt. Her hand left his arm. Once again, Cuddy came a little closer and had him trapped between her and the piano. She desperately wanted him to realize what they _could_ be together. The man had so much to offer that it scared him and would run back into misery and loneliness because he understood that better than anything else.

"I know you don't like when you can't rationalize everything, when feelings change the equation. Because you don't trust them, because you're afraid of just letting go – "

"You're acting like it's natural to you" he retorted angrily, facing her. Without his cane, he looked much taller than usual to her "I can't give you what you need, Cuddy. I'm screwed up. I'll hurt you like I always do. I'll lie to you. You'll lie to me too. Nothing good gonna come out of this. And you really don't want a misanthropic drug addict in Rachel's life"

"You sound like you've been giving it some thoughts"

"I don't have to _think_ about it, I just know it'd be like that"

"You like children" she said softly "you just don't know how to live with them"

Cuddy restrained herself from touching him, though she craved the feeling.

"House … I'm not asking you to be Rachel's father"

She regretted it immediately. That was a blurry lie, she wanted that family, she dreamt of it but she didn't want to scare him. Tonight wasn't the night.

He shook his head and moved past her, now standing near the fireplace. He could feel the heat invading his legs as the flames slowly consumed the logs. The sensation would soon become uncomfortable.

"So, to be perfectly clear, you want us to be together but you don't want me to approach Rachel or be close to her, in any ways" he observed, eyeing her "see, how fucked up that is"

"You want to be in Rachel's life?"

She felt stupid, weak in the knees and repressed the urgency that was dictating her to touch him and ask for his arms.

"I don't know" House answered honestly.

He stepped away from the fireplace, feeling sweat on his back and chest. His jean was burning. Though, he wasn't sure if Cuddy's proximity or the conversation was the reason of his discomfort. He swallowed.

"Who am I supposed to be?"

"Who do you want to be?" she returned the question, eyes locked with his. She felt a jolt of tenderness ran through her veins. She saw his armour crakle.

"I'm a misanthropic drug addict. You don't want that man in your life, Cuddy"

"You're already in my life" she answered, boldly yet prudent.

"You're an idiot"

"You're scared"

"You're ashamed of me" he said, barely louder than a whisper.

Just as she was about to say more, her phone rang in her purse. He shuddered.

"You should answer"

"I've never been ashamed of you, I've never even hated you" Cuddy responded, ignoring the phone call. He flinched, eyeing the bag on the floor "yes, you drive me crazy. And yes, sometimes, I _really_ want to strike you with your own cane" the image made her smile "but when I look at you, I see more than this _misanthropic drug addict_ you like to hide yourself behind"

Cuddy felt as if words couldn't do justice to all the feelings hidden in the depth of her heart, she felt desperate not to be able to express them.

"Why did you do it if you aren't afraid?" she asked.

He frowned, looked up.

"Wh- why what?"

She stepped closer.

"Why did you grab my breast instead of kissing me?"

He lowered his head and looked away. His right hand flinched. He clenched it.

"House" she said. Her voice was incredibly soft.

He felt trapped, cornered and self-conscious.

"You were having a hard time" he said finally, breathing in "I didn't want you to have to deal with me too"

"About twenty years late"

"It's easier to deal with someone who despises you"

She felt like she'd just been slapped. Cuddy wished she could tell him she did not despise him no matter how hard she's tried sometimes, no matter how many reasons he might has given her in the past. Her own armour was crackling. She didn't even know what to say anymore.

There was a change in her posture that told him he has lost some of her attention. He realized he didn't mind. Because of the ringtone or the growing tone of the conversation, Rachel had woken up.

« I should leave » she finally said « maybe, I shouldn't have come. Most of the guest must be there by now »

Suddenly this wasn't what he wanted even he's repeatedly asked her to leave. House swallowed. His all body was tensed and apprehensive, fearing the moment when he would find himself alone again. He took a few steps toward Cuddy who was putting her coat. She glanced at him quickly before taking her daughter. She saw the battle, the fears and the shyness in his eyes. He was lost and at a loss for words.

"You're not scared?" he asked. This was a whisper to her ears.

"Scared?" she wanted to laugh at the question "I'm scared all the time, House. Raising a child on my own is scary. Right now, the only thing I'm scared of is walking out of your apartment and losing the last chance we might have had to be something "

"We work together. We see each other every day"

"You know that's not what I was talking about"

He didn't answer so she opened the door.

"I love you just the way you are"

She couldn't believe she'd just said that and stood there for a while, completely dumbfounded. The quickness with which her feelings changed was scary. He was watching her, breathing through his mouth. He felt naked every time she did that – touching him with her eyes as if suddenly all his well-trained defences were scattered in millions of pieces.

When House came out of his reverie, he realized the door was closed. He hurried toward the window and watched her - his heart beating too fast, his mind raging. Their eyes met one last time and soon, she was gone.


	3. Chapter 3

**Leap of Faith**

* * *

 _Thank you, Lili, for your help with this story. And all, ya know._

* * *

 **Chapter III -**

 _ **7.05 p.m.**_

« You were with him? »

Cuddy breathed loudly, hung her coat then turned to face her mother. She was gone lest than an hour and she wished he was there with her, so she wouldn't have to face her mother's comments alone. She wished she could hold his hand and find some strength in his presence.

« Of course, you were with him, where else would you've been anyway » Arlene continued. Cuddy wondered why she was keeping her voice low. She was capable of making a scene "you have a child, now. Don't you think you should start thinking about her instead of desperately running in the arms of someone who wouldn't be a secure support for both of you?"

"Mum" Julia snapped firmly "leave her alone"

Julia was holding Rachel and was watching her sister's defence crackle.

"Lisa-"

"I need a moment alone, just a minute"

Cuddy shook her head and passed by her mother and sister. Most of the guests were already there. She heard someone call her name from the living room but didn't stop to check who it was and went straight to her bedroom. There, she sat on the edge of the bed and let the pressure fall on her tensed shoulders. Their relation has always been like a tug of war, about who would break first, who would make the first step or withdraw. Tonight was another example. She lost him once, two decades ago and she has come closed to lose him again many times. Away from the rumble, Cuddy wondered if he was thinking about it to.

Her mother's words echoed something deep inside her. She was right. She has a daughter and she has promised to take care of her. This little girl was all she had wished upon for years and she was now the guardian of her present and future. Cuddy went into the bathroom and adjusted her make-up. Standing in front of the mirror, she observed her reflection and profoundly breathed. She'll have to smile and forget him for the time the ceremony would last. _That shouldn't be that difficult_ , she told herself.

* * *

Julia met her in the corridor.

"Okay?" she asked softly.

"Okay" Cuddy replied then added with a small smile "tonight is about Rachel"

"And her mum too" Julia said. She touched her sister's arm with both affection and shyness "I know how strong you are, you've always been the strongest of us. And I know Rachel is what you've always wanted but you've all the rights in the world to be happy, Liz"

"I know, and I am. I assure you, Jules. I'm fine"

"Maybe he'll come?" the younger asked quietly "sorry, I'm sure you don't really want to talk about that right now"

"That's okay" Cuddy assured "thanks"

"Let's go?"

Cuddy kissed her cheeks and nodded before entering the living room.

* * *

 _ **7.40 p.m.**_

Rachel's simchat bat was beginning. There were smiles for her and her daughter, cradled in her arms. The rabbi began to recite the Biblical verses and when time came to hear the blessings, Cuddy looked around her. She smiled to Wilson who returned it – but who _also_ looked away quickly. She frowned and looked in the same direction.

Behind the assembly, one shoulder against the wooden pillar, House was watching her. Cuddy beamed brightly and bit her lips to limit her gorgeous smile. Her eyes were sparkling with a delightful and sincere happiness. Perhaps for the first time in his life, House knew he had truly made her happy. He had made a choice – he has heard her, listened to her and accepted her invitation. They stared at each other for what seemed like an eternity before Cuddy redirected her attention toward Rachel and the rabbi. Her heart was beating fast. She had a hard time focusing on the words that were pronounced. She was doing her best not to look at him.

Motherhood suited her. She was radiating with femininity and pride. To his eyes, she has never been more beautiful, more passionate and more caring. He'd lost her once after being expelled from Ann Arbour and he couldn't forget how it had felt to abandon her. Abandon, it's how it had felt. For years, he had simply shielded himself from any chance of that happening again. Two hours ago, he was contemplating the solitude of his apartment and thinking that his future would be written in that same loneliness. Now, if not clearer, the future seemed more hopeful. House focused on the present and watched Cuddy lit several candles.

He couldn't tear his eyes away from her. Earlier, Wilson has acknowledged his presence with a quick nod and a smile that told him he has made the right decision. For the last part of the ceremony, his blue eyes never left her and her baby. Showing up that night was a proof of his willingness to be with them – no matter how much he presently doubted himself. He had no idea how things could work but he wanted to give it a try. Deep down, it was what he's always wanted – though he wasn't sure he deserved her love. He would never be free of his doubts but he could learn to live with them.

* * *

The ceremony was finished and the rumours of conversations began to rise around him. A shiver ran down his spine when Cuddy looked at him – House stood straighter. Panic invaded him. She must have seen it in his eyes – even if there were several peoples between them – because she had a slight frown.

"Planning your escape?" Wilson wondered, hands in his trouser pockets.

Caught off guard by Wilson sudden apparition at his side, House momentarily lost the train of his thoughts and lose contact with Cuddy.

"Something like that"

With a quick glance at his best friend, House wondered if he knew Cuddy had paid him a visit before the ceremony. He himself wondered if he hadn't somehow hallucinated it.

"You're not a safe choice" he said quietly "but she chooses you, House. I don't know if I could ever explain that but it's always been you"

"Good god, where're the violins" House smirked desperately. Then he added more sombrely "I wish someday you'd stop seeing me as a constant danger"

"I wish someday you'd be more confident about yourself"

House blanched slightly and turned his head toward the assembly. His eyes fell on Cuddy's white shoulders and he heard the quick beatings of his heart resounded in his ears like a discorded drum. There were too many peoples and not enough room for him to think. Wilson saw confusion and misgiving pass on his best friend's face and knew he was not far from turning around and walking away.

"You can't back off and disappoint her every time"

"She invited me" House said eventually "then, she dis-invited me and then, she … re-invited me" he chuckled sadly "she's driving me crazy and I'm crazy about her"

Wilson had to smile, thinking they were both quite the pair.

"It's not all about her anymore"

" _Touché_ "

"It's okay to be scare" Wilson admitted with a small shrug "but you should talk with her"

"She doesn't quite have a conversation yet" House cracked, smiling a little despite himself.

"It's up to you now. You could have a conversation with Rachel in a few years – even now if you wanted to. You're good with kids, House"

"I don't know how to live with someone"

That was something Wilson couldn't deny. House has always been a loner and the past few years – perhaps decades – haven't helped much. House was a lone wolf but there was in him, Wilson believed, a desperate need to be understood and loved. House would probably roll his eyes if he were to say that out loud. Wilson considered Cuddy to be the one who could bring him the peace and self-acceptance he deserved. Even without knowing their story and past, Wilson has always known there was something deeper behind their friendship. He wished he could to do more but he thought Cuddy and House have reached a point where it was only the two of them together.

"What are you gonna do now?"

"Escape?" House proposed "I'm not good at small talk, I'm not even here for them" he said, nodding in the guests' direction. He ignored the glance a man casted him and took a deep breath. He felt lost with all those peoples around him, when all he wanted – and feared at the same time – was being in her sole presence.

"Where're you going?"

"I'm starving"

Wilson frowned but didn't follow his friend.


	4. Chapter 4

**Leap of Faith**

* * *

 _Final chapter of this story.  
Thank you for your comments!_

 _Enjoy._

 _Ju._

* * *

 **Chapter IV-**

 **8.30.p.m.**

Cuddy found him in the kitchen, with his coat still on and his nose into the opened fridge. She shook her head, smiling and not the slightest surprised to find him there. That was so him. There were too many people and she was perfectly aware that he didn't like crowd – even if she'd actually invited _only_ twenty persons. Cuddy watched him for a few seconds before entering.

"Can I help you?" she asked smugly.

He looked up and showed her a plate.

"Did you make that?"

"My mom did"

"I'll have some then"

She smiled again, amused by his light behaviour but aware it was also a façade. His eyes barely met hers – his demeanour exudes his shyness and discomfort. They were both scared of what could possibly be ahead of us. There was so much she wanted to tell him. Above all, she was craving for a kiss and blushed when the thought crossed her mind. She felt far less confident than when she was at his apartment. Cuddy was moved by his presence and touched he has accepted her late invitation. House devoured a piece of cake, leaned back against the counter. She came closer and watched his fingers chose another bit.

"I'm glad you're here"

"It isn't that bad" he answered, one eyebrow raised in the direction of said cake.

"Liar"

They smiled briefly to each other before Cuddy lowered her gaze again. However next to her, House felt like they were standing worlds apart. He needed to meet her on the ridge between their two worlds. The first step was his – she deserved it. Both their hearts were beating fast and it seemed like they could be interrupted at any time. Once again, the silence was overwhelming.

"I don't know what to say" House admitted.

He was so tensed each breath was a torture. He struggled to find his words.

"Well … I wanna say things, it's just … I don't know how to say them"

"Show me"

She saw him swallow and blushed for the umpteenth times that evening. House stared at her lips before focusing on her blue eyes, silently asking her the permission to do what he was about to do. Cuddy tensed in anticipation and her eyes fluttered shut when his hands slipped around her hips. She was beautiful. House slowly leaned over.

"You want me to kiss you when your mother is in the other room?"

Her eyes popped opened. He was grinning.

"You're such a bastard sometimes "

House bit the interior of his cheek before pressing his lips to hers. Cuddy slid her arms around his waist, drawing them closer together. He just kissed her lips, slowly and reverently, making sure it conveyed all the respect and passion he had for her. Warmth invaded him. By the way her fingers were pressed into his back, Cuddy clearly understood his message. When they pulled apart, House thought his heart was going to explode - and not only because he had a hard time breathing. He didn't let go of her hips. He wished he could cradle her into his arms and never have to face the outside world again.

Kissing her was strange, immensely familiar and natural – it made him forget everything else but it also made him painfully aware of the possibilities the future offer. They have kissed twice this evening, but he didn't know what it meant exactly. It scared and excited him. It made him want to run away and never leave her. He had thousands of mixed feelings and no words to put on them. It was a new language, hard to decipher but he was well-known for his interest in puzzle. She was the biggest of his life.

Cuddy felt his stomach's muscles flinch under the palm of her hand. When she finally looked into his blue eyes, she saw so many unsaid words that she wondered how she could have doubted him.

"I don't just want to kiss you" he whispered cautiously

"I don't despise you"

He let go of her but remained close.

"You don't"

"No, dummy" she chuckled. Her long hair danced on her shoulder. She was delightful.

She brushed his hand that was back on the counter. He was obviously looking for some support but didn't seem to experience much pain.

"I have faith in you, Cuddy" he shook his head with a frown "I just … don't know if I can, you know– there is so much things I'm not sure about"

"Nothing says I'm sure about everything myself"

"That doesn't make it easier"

He breathed out.

"Nobody says it's going to be easy but we'll figure it out" she replied quietly.

" _Easy_ is not the word I would choose to define us"

"Complicated?" she wondered.

"Challenging. Scary even"

"Ambiguous and hot"

He smirked.

"That would be you. Hot, I mean"

He had a half-smile and continued:

"Intense in every way"

* * *

"Here you are -"

Julia stopped dead in her tracks and bit back an amused smile.

"And in a nice company, I see"

Cuddy braced herself against the counter and bit her lips.

"I'm Julia, the little sis' and you must be House" she continued, enjoying her sister's shyness and the Diagnostician's awkwardness "oh my, did I interrupt something here?"

"Julia" Cuddy rolled her eyes.

"What?" she retorted innocently

"Apparently she decided that roads weren't too dangerous to drive on" muttered House. His eyes were full of mischief.

Cuddy bit the interior of her cheeks, remembering something he had said on the front doors of the PPTH. Julia cleared her throat.

"By the way, your guests are leaving, if you're still interested in the ceremony"

Cuddy checked her watch quickly and turned to face House.

"Don't leave?"

"Now that I'm here?" he smirked "plus, I'm really starving"

"You don't know him that well after all" Julia said casually.

"Believe me, I'm the first surprised" Cuddy replied quietly. She and House shared a meaningful look and quickly, as if she didn't want to be seen, Cuddy kissed the corners of his lips.

"Don't leave"

* * *

...

Cuddy closed the door of her home and silence filled her ears. Her back against the door, she breathed in and out, thinking about everything that had happened that evening. Just before leaving, Wilson has hugged her, and in her ear had whispered that they " _two deserve each other"_. She knew what or better _who_ he was talking about. Her relationship with House was complicated but in twenty years, they have always been there for each other. He was the guardian of many of her secrets and she understood his fear and demons perhaps better than anyone else - mostly thanks to their time in Michigan where he had been more inclined to talk about his feelings.

 _Talking about the devil_ , she thought as she saw him coming in her direction.

"I left you in the kitchen, what were you doing in my bedroom?"

"Just visiting"

She squinted and watched him suspiciously.

"What? You wanna run a body search on me, I'm okay with that by the way" he asked smugly.

"I'll just assume you're telling me the truth this time"

" _This time_ " he whined "words can hurt, you know"

She shook her head and smiled. The banter challenged her fatigue but slowed her reactivity. House noticed it of course and came to stand by her side. Cuddy moved away from the door and saw him grab the door knob. They looked at each other during a quiet, delectable instant during which they were able to read in the other's eyes the desire – the physical need – to share another kiss. The moment flew away when Julia came out the living room with Rachel in her arms. The little girl was asleep and Julia told them she was putting her in her crib. Cuddy nodded and thanked her. By her side, House shifted position.

He looked at her, earnestly. And offered, amused but sincere:

"When the parasite gives you a break, I could annoy you instead"

"Yeah, sure" Cuddy replied. Her heart fluttered in her chest.

"Cool"

He opened the door. The winter came in.

"Good night, Cuddy"

"Good night, House"

She gave him _that_ smile and watched him leave.

* * *

In the darkness of her bedroom, Cuddy tip-toed around the furniture and slowly took off her blue dress. The garment caressed her legs and fell on the floor. She felt at peace. Happy. Apprehensive. Hopeful. She went into the bathroom and couldn't help grinning at her reflection. She felt silly, exciting and scared. Butterflies danced in her belly at the memories of his lips on hers. They were giving themselves a chance, with a mutual and silent desire to take things as they come.

She turned off the bathroom's light and lit the one on her nightstand. Every nerves in her body shivered at the sight of a brown, large envelop under her pillow. Her fingers took hold of the three sheets of paper and once again, Cuddy's eyes fell on the title of the melody he had written for them.

It takes a leap of faith to get things going.

And they might just be what he was willing to believe in.

* * *

 _The End._


End file.
